Science has proven that 'love at first sight' is just physical desire.

In the excitement of romance, it can be easy to believe that two strangers can fall in love at first sight. But is love at first sight real?

You're at a party and you look around. 1, 2, 3… 5, your heart skips a beat. Your eyes light up, your mind goes crazy like fireworks. These are the exact signs of falling in love at first sight.

Perhaps that is also the vision of many people when looking forward to a chance meeting with their other half. Although it sounds like a fairy tale, the reality is completely different.

Love or lust?

What is love? There can be many different definitions of love. According to the Merriam-Webster dictionary, love is ' an intense feeling for another person arising from kinship or personal ties' , while a team of scientists from Rutgers University, New Jersey, suggest that love can be divided into three types: desire, attraction and attachment .

According to a study published in December 2017 in the Journal of the International Society for Relationship Studies, "love at first sight" or "love at first sight" seems to stem from lust or a desire for "closeness" more than true love .

While the hormones testosterone and estrogen, controlled by the amygdala - the brain region that regulates emotions - are responsible for desire, attraction is determined by the stress and reward centers - the nucleus accumbens and ventral striatum.

The neurotransmitters dopamine, noradrenaline, and cortisol are all at play when a person feels attracted to someone. When it comes to attachment, oxytocin and vasopressin dominate.

Does "love at first sight" really exist?

To date, there has been little scientific research into whether or not love at first sight actually exists. Researchers have used three types of studies, including experiments, online surveys, and organized dates, including one speed date.

The study involved 400 volunteers, mostly students in the Netherlands and Germany, and more than 500 interactions. The study asked participants to report each time they were 'struck by lightning,' and then to record how physically attractive they felt about their partner. The researchers also asked participants to rate how they felt about intimacy, physical attraction, fidelity, passion, and other concepts often associated with 'true love.'

The study found that 32 participants had been struck by love at first sight 49 times (meaning that many people never experienced it). However, when it came to attitudes toward fidelity and intimacy, important parts of love, there was no strong correlation between those who had fallen in love at first sight. This is not surprising, since love at first sight often occurs with someone who is considered physically attractive.

"The experience of 'love at first sight' is confirmed by high desire, not intimacy or fidelity. Physical attraction is highly associated with 'love at first sight ,'" the study report said. "Thus, we argue that 'love at first sight' is not a distinct form of love, but rather a strong attraction at first sight or in retrospect, which some people call 'love at first sight.'"

Regarding the 'retrospection' mentioned above, the researchers explain that many relationships are re-evaluated after they have been successfully established, and 'couples may change their memory structures to strengthen the relationship.' So, they may have immediately viewed their partner as attractive and definitely wanted to know more about that person. A few years later, that perception turns into that person 'being the missing piece of their life.'

Love at first sight is often associated with "fairy tale love".

Although the research results are completely contrary to what happens in novels and "romance" movies, some scientists and experts also seem to disagree with what is shown in the movies. Simply because they have seen too much valid evidence.

'Everyone wants to feel something strong for someone, but that's actually a biological response to physical desire and attraction that's released by hormones in the brain. That instant desire usually fades quickly once you get past the attraction and get to know each other,' explains Caitlin Bergstein, a matchmaker in Boston. 'To find true love, you have to know them. You have to understand their intentions, their values, how they see the world, what their goals are for the future. The reactions and connections that create lasting love take time to develop. So having an instant connection with someone is not the norm for true love.'

Bergstein's colleague Andrea Leiser agrees and often advises her clients not to set themselves up with too high expectations. "Many of my clients are not very attractive before the first date, and I will convince them to take the opportunity that suits their personality and priorities ," she says. "I always tell them that if they have a good first date, there will be at least one more. Physical attraction and love develop as you get to know the other person better. For example, when you see the other person being nice to strangers, playing with children, or making a few surprises for you at night, you find them more attractive. And just like attraction, love for some people takes time to develop."

Is love a mixed hormone?

Many people consider love to be a cocktail of hormones released to give their nervous system a sense of pleasure and security.

Eric Ryden, clinical psychologist and couples therapist at Couples Therapy in the UK, says: 'Love affects both the mind and body in dramatic ways. Along with the euphoria and obsessive thoughts, there is an increase in the secretion of happy hormones, mainly dopamine – associated with reward and pleasure – and oxytocin – sometimes called the love hormone because it is associated with feelings of warmth, love and trust. As we saw earlier, these hormones tend to be higher during the attachment stage, rather than initial lust or attraction.'

Love or addiction?

The early stages of love can look a lot like addiction, says Dr Deborah Lee, reproductive health expert and medical writer for Dr Fox Online Pharmacy in the UK: 'Similar areas of the brain are activated in both early love and cocaine addiction. As a lover focuses on their partner, they feel crazy, experience mood swings along with euphoria, act obsessively and/or compulsively, are living in a distorted reality and often become dependent on the other person - in a similar way to how someone with cocaine addiction behaves.'

This feeling eases as the relationship ages, and the later stages of romantic love no longer mimic drug addiction, according to a 2016 study in the journal Frontiers in Psychology.

Love at first sight is just lust and true love will come later.

Emotional state?

According to a 2012 paper in the Journal of Neuroscience, memories can change as people recall them, often influenced by a person's emotional state when they recall them. The next time someone recalls the same memory, it will be more distorted than the last time.

Therefore, one's perception of a partner and how someone may initially feel about them can be distorted by their current feelings for them. So while people may think it was love at first sight, that may not be true.

In addition to distorted recall, a person's perception of their partner is generally positive or biased, due to a phenomenon known as "positive illusion."

A 2018 study in the journal Frontiers in Human Neuroscience suggests that the happiest couples are those who view each other through 'rose-colored glasses ,' with less conflict and suspicion and increased relationship satisfaction.

Positive illusions can also trick people into thinking they fell in love on day one, when in reality it took a longer time to get there.