Cure the first nose

An elderly woman walked into the doctor's office and mentioned a rather delicate problem.

- I am loyal throughout the day, Dr. John. Since I came here, I have hit 20 shots already. But the strange thing is that they rarely make a sound, and never smell. What should I do?

The respectable doctor listened with an enduring expression on his face. Then he replied:

- This is a prescription, Mrs. Harris. Take 3 capsules a day for 7 days and then return to see me in a week.

The following week, Mrs. Harris entered the clinic again with a worried face.

- Doctor, I don't know what is in the pills, but my illness is worse. I still beat as much as I used to, but now they smell like they can't stand it. What can you say?

- Calm down, Mrs. Harris - The doctor gently interrupted - So I have cured her nose. Now we can start to treat the disease you require.

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Watch the pot, watch the direction

The daughter, before going home to her husband, was told by her mother: " On the side, I have to keep the mind, watch the pot, sit and watch the direction I hear you ".

Her daughter obeys. But in less than a month, the girl complained to the girl:

- Before your child comes to this side, don't you give me any instructions?

The girl said:

- Why not, sister! I told him to be careful that " eat and watch, watch and watch ", sister.

The sui boy slapped his hand on his lap saying:

- I knew that! When eating, it always considers which pot is good to eat. While sitting at the table, it chose which direction to have more food to sit.

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Lack of substance

The two good old friends met each other, one said: " I look like you are sick, you seem to have a lack of calcium. You should see a doctor ."

- No, I'm sick. Why do you tell me I lack calcium?

- That's strange, so why has your adulterous wife been a long time and haven't seen you horny?

- ???